DannyBoyinExile

Being on lockdown, I’m forced to remember some of the things we do to get through such a Spartan existence. For one thing, we only shower three times a week now, for however long this lasts. Believe me – some people need far more showering than that, in order to peacefully coexist with another person in the cell.
The solution is the “bird bath”. That’s where you hang the sheet up, then use a rag, soap, and water from the sink to wash and then rinse yourself as well as you’re able. This keeps you clean, makes you FEEL better (not to mention smell better!), and even keeps you cooler – especially when you take the sheet down and get back underneath your fan.
Food tends to grow really scarce on lockdown – specifically for the unfortunate guys who haven’t been to commissary lately. My wing, for example, was scheduled to go to store the day the whole state went on lockdown (D-Day!) – but they were kind enough to lock us down instead.
All we eat on lockdown is three sack meals a day, so the routine is to save a sandwich for later on, when you start to get hungry, instead of eating them both right away. You won’t exactly get “full” either way – but it SEEMS like you don’t get as hungry when you know you have something put aside, just in case.
We also tend to become masters at conserving what commissary we do have left. Thee are always people yelling on the run, offering to pay “2-for-1” on commissary day for a bag of coffee, some soups, or whatever else. Which perfectly illustrates the old saying about a bird in the hand being worth two in the bush. Because I’d much rather have a real bag of coffee in my locker now, than to have someone else owe me two hypothetical ones on commissary day. There’s no telling when that may be, or what could happen between now and then.
We also learn to make do with what we have available. For example, we are given small boxes of cereal at least once a day with no milk whatsoever. Some guys just chomp their cereal dry (like a horse does!), while others even use Kool-Aid instead of milk, which actually doesn’t taste bad. (It almost makes you Cheerios taste like Fruit Loops!) =-)
I personally take ONE packet of instant oatmeal, dump it in my cup, and add WAY more water than I need. Let it sit for about 10 minutes, then the oatmeal will be “cooked” (but cold) – with way too much water. So I dump a box or two of dry cereal, stir it up, and Voila! All that excess water is now sweet, like milk – and even adds chunks of fruit to your cereal, when you stir it with the oatmeal!
I also coined the term “trailer park cheese”. That’s when you’re running low – or out – of squeeze cheese, so you crush up a handful of Cheese Puffs, and mix that in your soup instead! It may not taste EXACTLY like squeeze cheese – but it gets the job done.
We do what we must, to survive on lockdown. Our situation could always be worse. But it could always be better, too. So I’m always looking for ways to improve things – which isn’t a bad idea, no matter where you live. So says DannyBoy.