DannyBoyinExile

I remember seeing a sign when I was a kid (yes, I can remember that far back) that said, “I’m not a dirty old man – I’m a sexy senior citizen!”
Well, I’m not a sexy senior citizen just yet, and I’m more of a pre-vert than a pervert, but I’m certainly old enough to understand what it meant.
I’ve been here since I was 19. And even though I’m… ahem… 50 now, and have a few gray hairs creeping in (did I say gray? I meant blonde!), I still feel a little flabbergasted when I hear someone say, “Look out, old school!” – and realize that he’s talking to me! I mean, you could call me an old, lying, murdering thief, and I’d have to interrupt you, if only to say, “I am NOT old…”
It’s a fact of life that people do age, in TDCJ as well as elsewhere. They even give us a physical exam once a year, to see just how much we’re aging, and whether or not we’re developing any health conditions that require treatment. This has always been an in-and-out affair for me (a quick visit, I mean, not a prostate examination!) – when I bothered to go at all.
I don’t have any diseases or health issues to speak of, except for a minor case of high blood pressure. I suppose I have good genes to thank for that, because it’s certainly not because of how well I’ve taken care of my body. Maybe all the drugs that I’ve ingested in the past have ensured that I DON’T need any now! (just kidding) The fact that I don’t do any type of drugs anymore, in addition to all the exercise I get at work, will hopefully keep me in shape for some time to come.
I’ve never had any sort of health or work restrictions, which I’m proud of, so when the lady offered to put me on the Diet For Health (DFH) diet, I politely declined. She said, “Well, then you’ll have to sign a refusal.”
In TDCJ, we can refuse any type of medical treatment by signing a refusal form, which is then placed in our medical records, but I didn’t understand how that applied to me. I was like, “Why would I have to sign a refusal for a diet that I’ve never been on in the first place?”
She responded that by offering it to me, she was RECOMMENDING it to me, and I had to sign a refusal if I didn’t accept it. So I thought about doing just that – until I remembered all the guys who have been raving about how much better their diet trays have been, compared to our regular ones. Who am I to turn down some better food, in the name of better health? So I accepted the doctor’s kind offer.
Well, I’m two weeks into this special diet – and I’m sad to say that I haven’t eaten a single thing different than the people on the regular diets! It seems that in TDCJ, budgets come before health, just as it does in the dictionary. Now we all eat basically the same meals, which is far more economical, I must admit.
I recently learned that TDCJ considers inmates “elderly” once they reach the age of fifty, which makes me officially old. But at least I’m still more of a sexy senior citizen than a dirty old man! So says DannyBoy.