DannyBoyinExile

I’ll always remember the first time I ever won an argument with one of my teachers. She had the audacity to correct me, incorrectly, by telling me that the word “ain’t” is not a word.
I’m like, “The WORD ain’t is not a word? Au contraire! It IS a word!”
She basically told me, “Since you’re so smart, why don’t YOU come teach the class, and explain how it IS a word?”
Ordinarily I would have been embarrassed to speak in front of the class – but not when I had right on my side! I stepped to the chalkboard.
“Ladies and gentlemen (this was back when everyone was either one or the other!), my name is Mr. Matthews, but you can call me Danny.”
This got a few giggles. I then got right to the point, before my mind jumped to something else, and I forgot what I was gonna say!
“Does anyone know what a word IS? The dictionary says it’s a series of letters or sounds that is commonly understood to represent a specific thing or idea. By that definition (which is THE definition), how could ain’t NOT be a word? We all know exactly how to pronounce it, how to spell it, and exactly what it means, right?”
Then I turned to my teacher. “Why AIN’T it a word?” Clearly, she wasn’t impressed. I got a round of boisterous applause from the class – but was STILL sent to the principal’s office, for two swats on my behind. So much for a jury of my peers!
I can’t claim credit for coining the word ain’t – but I HAVE coined a few others since then, one of which is “antihistafiend”. It’s basically a shortened form of antihistamine fiend: a person who will take just about any sort of pills to try and get high. Benadryl is definitely a favorite around here, but an antihistafiend will take anything to get a buzz – even psych pills, which will only put them to sleep!
I’ve seen guys sleep for two days, then stagger to the dayroom like a zombie and say, “Man, I was high!” No you weren’t – you were asleep! I suppose it’s a form of escape for some people (in much the same way that losing your mind is, I suppose!) or maybe even a sign of depression.
The pills may make us forget about our situation, but it won’t change anything. One of these days, we still have to wake up and face our circumstances – because that’s the only way we’ll be able to change them. You’d be surprised at how much you can change your situation just by changing YOURSELF!
I’ll admit to bingeing on a few Benadryls or mucus relief pills in my day – but I’ll also admit to how much better I feel to be in my normal state of mind today. When I DID tell people I wasn’t taking that stuff anymore, they jeered at me. “You ain’t taking them any LESS, either!”
They can take all the pills they like, but I’ve gone from being an antihistafiend to being antihistafree – and I’d encourage anyone to do the same. We may be in prison, but there are still things we can accomplish from here. And we’re still alive, so we might as well make the most of it. So says DannyBoy.