DannyBoyinExile

There are many unwritten rules amongst the inmates of TDCJ that are every bit as official (and binding) as the written ones. These unofficial policies usually develop as a means to deal with a particular problem that came up – or a way to avoid a potential conflict before it became a problem. Once upon a time, TDCJ was a place where new people were quickly pulled aside and “schooled” by their peers, whoever they happened to be. Today, not so much.
With so many young people coming to prison, with so much time to do, many of our fellow inmates feel that they are just too tough to be told what to do. That’s fine! (For them to feel that way, I mean.) But they are still going to find themselves amidst the conflicts that the unofficial rules were formed to resolve in the first place. After a few lessons from the school of hard knocks, even the most stubborn gangster will realize that it’s a lot easier to go with the flow, rather than facing the animosity of his peers.
These inmate-made rules run the gamut of everything from not dipping your cup into the cooler that everyone has to drink out of, to fish for ice, to the “drop one, flush one” policy to keep from subjecting your cellmate to cruel and unusual punishment when you use the bathroom.
Some of these rules can be considered fashion statements, as they affect our dress code. There used to be one about never going to the dayroom wearing only your shower shoes – because anything could happen out there, so you’d best be prepared for it. It’s a sign of progress that that particular rule has become obsolete. Today’s TDCJ is laid-back to the point that many people feel perfectly comfortable to go to the dayroom in only their shower shoes – and some of them even walk to chow like that! Better them than me. I know that nothing is likely to happen out there (especially anything that concerns me!), but I feel better sticking to the old way, as it was originally drilled into my head.
Another fashion rule is the “one pair, don’t care” policy. What that means is, quite simply, you do not go outside your cell wearing nothing but one pair of boxer shorts. You must always wear either an extra pair of boxers, some gym shorts, or your state pants over your underwear. The reason for this is that if you wear only one pair of boxers, they are practically see-through! NOBODY (or at least, not many people) wants to see your genitalia on display as you walk down the run. (It IS a run – not a runway!) Conversely, YOU shouldn’t want anyone looking directly at your hairy buttocks as you walk by! That is a no-no.
This policy affected me personally, just the other day. They rolled the doors after chow, and I ran to my cell to quickly take my pants and shirt off, put my shorts and T-shirt on, and return to the dayroom to do some pushups. I hurriedly made a cup of coffee, swallowed an amino acid pill, and jogged back downstairs.
I dropped down to do a set, and just as I noticed that I was feeling a little breezy out there, a friend of mine yelled at me. “DannyBoy! One pair, don’t care?”
Ha! I was in such a rush to grab my stuff that I forgot to put my gym shorts on, and went to the dayroom in only my T-shirt and boxers. It was one pair – but I DID care, so I hurriedly asked the guard (a female one, to make matters worse!) if I could quickly run to my cell and grab my shorts, which I’d forgotten.
After giggling at me, she agreed, and I was fully clad, in no time. Hopefully I didn’t attract any secret admirers to my front OR back side, because I sure wasn’t looking for any.
It’s generally a good idea to obey even the unofficial rules, wherever you happen to live. There are times when I will do what I feel is right, even if everyone around me feels that it’s wrong. But at other times, it’s best to just go with the flow. That way, when some poor guy is getting ridiculed – at least it won’t be me! Mistakes do happen. But as long as you correct them as soon as possible – at least it’ll be somebody ELSE’S butt being stared at in the dayroom, and not yours. The next man’s butt is his own business, but I’d prefer to keep mine to myself. So says DannyBoy.