DannyBoyinExile

The PURPOSE of words, and the reason we can speak at all, is to communicate more effectively. You want to have as broad a vocabulary as possible, so you can pinpoint exactly what you mean, so that there’s no room for error or misunderstandings.
As times change, and we grow more advanced (well… some of us), our vocabulary will also expand, to reflect these new advances, innovations, inventions, and ideas. This is true all over the world, and it’s no different in prison. Our vocabulary grows and evolves as much as anybody’s – it’s just not always anything to be proud of.
Sadly, the drug culture has produced more words (whether slang or literal) than just about anything else in TDCJ. You don’t have to be involved in any illicit activities to be exposed to it – and you can’t help but pick up on what’s going on in your environment.
I don’t smoke K2, for example. But when I hear a guy walking down the run and yelling, “Sticks! Two good! Man Down!”, I know exactly what he means. In prison, the word “joint” has been replaced with “stick”.
“Two good” means two dollars worth of food items from commissary. Food items are considered “good money”, as opposed to stamps or hygiene items, which are known as “junk money”.
“Man Down”, of course, means that there’s a good chance that if you smoke too much, you will hit the floor, unconscious. Consequently, when they call the staff to carry your dumb ass to medical, that’s what they yell. “Man Down!”
Man Down, by the way, was the newest term. Before that, the really strong stuff was known as “gas”. As in, “That stuff is some GAS!”
When so many people eventually fell unconscious and had to be rushed to the infirmary – or even died – the vocabulary had to evolve with it, so people would know exactly what they were getting.
The latest innovation around here, vocabulary-wise, is SLUMPED. (Pronounced “slumpt”.) That’s when a person is technically conscious, but slumped over like a junkie who is nodding off on heroin. (Like an idiot, in other words!)
You’ll find people slumped wherever they happen to smoke it – whether it’s in their cells, the run, the dayroom, or the rec yard. I’ve even seen kitchen workers slumped out in the dishroom, during chow! Which leads to the latest adjective for them: “Look at Slumpty Dumpty in there!”
Someone who has been caught slumped out, or someone who stays that way so often that it’s practically their natural state, is derisively called Slumpty Dumpty.
It’s easy to laugh at someone in that shape – as long as they’re not affecting anyone else with their antics. When it comes to them getting their entire wing placed on lockdown because of their foolishness, there will generally be repercussions.
Some people won’t even LIVE with somebody like that. Just yesterday, a guy I know got a new cellie. He DOESN’T smoke, so as soon as he found out the guy was a Slumpty Dumpty, he had to go. He told him to not even unpack, because he was NOT living in the cell with him, and he was gone. Now he’s someone else’s problem.
I don’t smoke, and don’t condone the people who do. But I can see how important it is for the language to evolve. Those slang terms represent something specific, and they’re all different, so it’s important for them to know exactly what they’re getting.
I’m not particularly interested in keeping up with their lingo, but if I’m around it, I can’t help but pick up on it. Intelligent people will always learn from their surroundings, and I like to think that I do still have the teeniest bit of intelligence inside me. I just keep it well hidden! So says DannyBoy.