DannyBoyinExile

Some people have the audacity to assume that I’ve gone a little crazy, because I’ve spent so many years in TDCJ. But I disagree! In fact, the more craziness I see around here, the more convinced I am that I’m not so bad after all.
Just the other day, I was on my way to the dayroom, when I encountered a road block on the stairs. Once upon a time, I’d have considered it very strange to witness an unconscious person in such a public place (he was actually blocking traffic), but not anymore. I immediately knew that he’d gotten ahold of some Man Down, smoked too much – and didn’t even make it to the dayroom before he passed out.
So I did the most uncrazy thing I could think of: I stepped over his dumb ass and kept going. I suppose it would’ve been more humanitarian to stop and assist him – but my hands were full! Before I could set down my cup of coffee and tablet, somebody else helped the poor guy, so my assistance was no longer needed. Or so I thought.
About the only way you can “help” an unconscious idiot (what else would I call him?) is to carry him away from the scene of the crime, and make sure he is breathing. A few other guys did that, by dragging him to the janitor’s closet – and throwing a few cups of water in his face, for good measure.
About 15 minutes later, he STILL wasn’t conscious, but he did vomit all over himself. That wasn’t much of an improvement (especially to his appearance!), so they called for backup. “DannyBoy! DO something!”
I’m no doctor, by any means, but I did everything I could. (I prayed for him!) (just kidding) I saw that he was starting to come around, and all he could do was sleep it off. So I grabbed another white guy (the moron was white, so it was sort of our responsibility to take care of it), and we literally picked this guy up and CARRIED him all the way back to his cell – which was no easy task.
For one thing, he lived way up on three row – and halfway down the run – so it was more of a TREK than a quick trip, for sure. For another thing, he was beginning to come back out of it. He wasn’t completely coherent, but he knew that he’d messed up, and our policy dictates that he get his ass kicked for it.
Of course, that was the furthest thing from our minds just then. We simply wanted to get him out of sight, and back to his cell, so he could sleep it off and recuperate. (Preferably before he got caught, and got our entire wing placed on lockdown!)
We had to MANHANDLE this guy all the way up the stairs. And he’s thinking we’re about to beat him up! So he is grabbing ahold of every stair, rail, or steel bar he passes, in an attempt to stop our progress. By the time we got to three row we were exhausted, we had HIS vomit smeared all over us – but we had to keep ahold of him, lest he yank free and fall completely off three row. (I could hear myself telling the judge, “Your Honor – we were just trying to HELP the guy!”)
I am happy to say that we did git ‘er done, and we all survived the ordeal without injuries or repercussions. God looks out for drunks, idiots, and kids – so we were covered, two different ways! =-)
The next day he got the ass-kicking he deserved (though not by me – I was still tired!), and put the event behind him. He even thanked me profusely, for taking care of him, and getting him back in his cell. (He didn’t remember, of course, but was told about it.)
He was so embarrassed by the ordeal that he gave up drugs altogether – which was the best possible outcome. We’ve seen this scenario unfold a hundred times around here, with varying results. Some guys go through the same thing, over and over again. But sometimes people learn their lessons – so we should always be willing to give them a chance. So says DannyBoy.